You know me. Late, as usual, with the things I wanna do and giving heart and soul to what I have to do. Trying to meld those two together isn’t as easy as your childhood self thought. For too many weeks now I’ve been on autopilot and today of course that stops. It helps that I got about 12 hours of never before heard of sleep last night but I digress.
A goal takes you off autopilot. A goal is making a dream the life you’re living. In fact I would go so far as to say this about the creation and mastery of the goal: it forces the mind to focus, unequivocally, on the issue of the life at hand. Make no mistake, Hitler had goal(s). The goal is a weapon of the wakened conscious. You can’t have a goal and kind of not notice it. It’s like being a little bit pregnant-something is off, something is there. And it has a timeframe from which it will eventually make its grand (and messy) escape from the womb- yes we are still speaking metaphorically (Unless that happened to you. Then…awkward.).
There’s two opposing viewpoints on this, wait no, three. But the last one is the one you don’t- I mean REALLY- don’t want to go to but I should mention it anyway.
You could:
The Tendzin Choegyal strategy: Say fuck it. That’s right. FUCK IT. But not exactly how you’re thinking. Recently I read an interview in Giant Robot regarding the Dalai Lama’s younger brother. Now I do know what you’re thinking. The Dalai Lama has a SURPRISE BROTHER??? Who knew? Where has he been? What does he do? Where does he go?
Well then. That sucks. Consider, if you will, the following: how could you ever compete when your big brother’s the bloody leader of Buddhists everywhere, one of the most respected men in the world, on the Time’s list of 100 (just 100!!!) most influential people in the world who knows how many times including the 2008 list… I mean Christ, come on.
But the way it went down was even crazier. You see, he also got summoned to a higher calling. He is also the reincarnation of an important spiritual figure. And where his brother embraced his role, this guy said the above statement: Fuck dat, me nah do it (as my grandmother would say). He booked it and was a total rebel. His favourite movies are war movies like Saving Private Ryan. He takes lithium. He agrees with his brother religious views and thinks his being chosen was a “fluke”. I have this book called “The Most Important Thing I Know” regarding life lessons. And he’s someone I think they ought to have solicited. People like that, who at a young age have the strength of character to know the way his life needed to play out was in the pursuit of his own happiness…? A nirvana of self you might say. To know and ( I don’t know if he’s accepted this ineptitude on his part but…) accept the inability to lead millions when he knows he’s not ready…a goal can allow you to sweep aside the grappling hooks of other’s desires when they try to trap you down. Its not that he lacked that calm that his brother has in the face of adversary. But he’s more the kind of guy who pops a bottle of piss wine and asks anyone if they want a bit of liquid courage for the journey.
The Randy Pausch strategy: Laugh and prove yourself past the brick walls. “ "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams" For more, visit www.cmu.edu/randyslecture.
"Journeys" are special University Lectures in which Carnegie Mellon faculty members share their reflections on their journeys -- the everyday actions, decisions, challenges and joys that make a life.” That’s the afterschool introduction.
I’m not going to mention how hard it was to view this stupid video on youtube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo&watch_response) because it kept cutting out because it’s not important. He makes a list of his childhood dreams and he makes his way through them. His quotes go through the following:
“Brick walls are there for a reason: they let us prove how badly we want things”
“the head fake”
“It’s very important to know when you’re in a pissing match. And it’s very important to get out of it as quickly as possible”
“Psh, like Wiley Coyote”
“They both said the same thing but think about how they said it”
“Some brick walls are made of flesh”
“It was a lot like the Soviet Union. It was a little dicey for awhile.”
“You’d be amazed how many 19 year old boys are out of ideas when you take those two off the table”
“Sensei what do I do?”
“I’ve never had parents come to class before. It was flattering but frightening”
“…And talk about quick on your feet…pulls out his ninja sword and says ’I am dishonoured AWGHHHH!!!’ and just drops…he’s laying there lifeless”
“The course was all about bonding…if they’re standing close to each other, the world is good”
“When you’re doing something pioneering you are going to get those arrows in the back and you just have to put up with it. Everything that could go wrong…”
“When you’ve had something for ten years that you hold so precious, it’s the toughest thing in the world to hand it over. And the only advice I can give you is find someone better than you to hand it to. And that’s what I did”
“Two kindreds spirit but we’re very different’
“I detect nervous laughter”
“This is a terrible joke but I’m going to use it anyway because I know Don will forgive me”
“Sharing an office with Don was like sharing a space with a tornado. There was just so much energy and you never knew which trailer was next”
“None of that book learning thing…by now they should have read all the books”
“And we took field trips!”
“Oh god I hear the nervous laughter from the students. I had forgotten the delayed shock therapy effects of these bar charts”
“Boy that’s hard feedback to ignore- some still managed. But for the most part people looked at that and went wow I gotta kick it up a notch, I gotta start thinking about what I’m saying to people in these meetings. And that is the best gift and educator can give, is to get someone to become self reflective”
“And I guess that makes me the real mad hatter”
“He was like a mythical creature. He was like a centaur but a really, really pissed off centaur”
“I don’t know how to not have fun. I am dying and I’m having fun. And I’m going to keep having fun every day I have left because there’s no other way to play it”
“I think I’m clear where I stand on the great Tigger or Eeyore debate”
He’s got a bunch of humorous sayings like this that I didn’t quote and it felt like I quoted the whole thing. I don’t care that he’s dying but it does suck because he’s the kind of guy who I’d like to spend the rest of my life learning from. He’s like my friends I have now: sarcastically humorous in a mischievous sort of way, lots of heart, and plenty of nerdy facial expressions and facts. The reason I kept going and hacking away at trying to see this whole video was because I want to see more of the jokes. My crew and I say stupid things like that all the time. The fact is we aren’t as funny if you can’t see the face that goes with the joke. The audience is thinking like myself: we are him and he is us…but better. If I wasn’t already going to a school that’s best for me, I would be inspired as all heeeelllll to go where he is. He has created the Alice program which teaches kids and college students to script computer software. I will be downloading it. I’ve always wanted to learn and it seemed too hard so I’m getting the fuck on that. By the way, the last ten minutes are so key.
So to recap:
Laugh but work hard.
“It’s kind of fun to do the impossible”
Play really sweet pranks but be so smart about it they just say “bastard” with love and chuckle.
Gather a team and assemble. Like the Avengers, man.
The Nemesis Strategy: I have this unnamed person in my field or repertoire of social associates who has a major nemesis. It consumes them with a passionate heft of their being. I believe that scientists who can’t find the part of your brain where your heart is could map out the exact parts of this brain where their goal lies in regards to their nemesis with one of those rulers you get out of a cereal box for baby geniuses. I am constantly and consistently amazed at the lengths they will go to make sure their nemesis is both out of their life and yet constructing the boundaries of their life as well. The thing about nemeses is the same reason the villain on cartoons aren’t very plausible. On some base level we are aware as children that no one really cares that much. When we get older we’re better able to vocalize this knowledge. This person is both childishly and fanatically devoted to their goals. You could fault them as much as you could a Star Trek fan or Cosplayer. I am, of course, completely disassociated with this person despite my curiosity at their batshitcraziness due to my complete love for them. People like these are loved and loved dearly. They don’t hate ANYONE except their nemesis. They are unwavering in this devotion and, except for the unlucky bastard, they have no room to hate anyone else. One person is enough, thank you. And, on some level, despite the abject refutes of several colleagues: I think this person is very happy doing and living this life that they lead. Almost no one tells them what to do anymore. Every one you know thinks you’re crazy. At this point they’re just glad you haven’t started on a street corner somewhere. There must be a relief in knowing this is the lowest people will ever think of you. And guess what? You survived their bad judgement. Funny, you thought you wouldn’t but then oopsy daisy, you did.
Now I’m not going to tell you what to do. I’ve obviously made my own choice but you have to make yours. Worse, maybe you already have. When you have the weapon of a goal you can draw the lines in the sand clearly enough for you to see.
The lines that divide us from ourselves are, unfortunately, ourselves. Our negativity, our pessimism, our hardened hearts and thoughts… And all this can be funny, hilarious even, in the right contexts. But too often these harsh vortexes take us far, far away from living our dreams into a polar (I always associate poles with the North Pole, which is associated with Christmas, which is associated with Santa, who lives in the Artic [for some unspecified reason…probably to escape our narcissistic obese addiction to consumerism. My guess.] which is cold and desolate, which I then associate with the word pole. Hmm, I like this game. AnYWAY.) dystopia which we call reality.
Because in reality, we are no one special.
In reality, those who take risks always lose.
In reality, there are no exceptions to the rule.
I say, that right now, some of us are in a dystopia. George Orwell, etc etc- the rest of us are out there really living and the rest are asleep on autopilot.
But we can wake up any second.
At the end of the day you know what that is: hope.
Soundtrack: The rain outside my window.
